The next three entries cover what happened at Media. I'm working on the sixth entry now, and I hope to post two more tomorrow. Entry Two No story ever starts at the beginning. Mine is no exception. My life was turned upside down almost a year ago. This journal merely starts after a plot point. I wish to make a note in this entry of recent events, mostly so I don't forget. The insanity started at Port Lansing a few days ago. Maybe it was over a week, I'm not sure how much time has passed exactly. My master holds court there annually. Having a public session allows for Imperial citizens and non-citizens to take care of business in a slightly "safer" environment than the Coruscant palace. It was at this session where the trouble started. I was in my Red Guard uniform, doing my duty to protect to protect His Majesty and the Empress. And if you ask me, the Empire seriously needs to rethink those helmets. It's no wonder the Red Guard gets such a bad wrap. We can't see a damn thing in those helmets! Let alone breathe! But I digress. The first people to appear in court were Tara and Topaz. I met them a few months ago after the Tattooine battles. Part of me wasn't surprised to see them. Tara is the adopted daughter of Princess Anelis after all. Then I saw that Tara had brought Lon with her. I didn't move or say anything, knowing that they wouldn't recognize in uniform. My heart was pounding. I was actually scared for him. For Lon. My master approached him, forcing him to his knees. It was then that I realized we had been set up. My master knew the whole time about my relationship with Lon. I was foolish to think I could hide anything from him. I had to intervene and quickly. I removed my helmet and confronted my master. He only slammed Lon against the far wall in response. I begged him to stop, but he wanted to continue torturing Lon. I couldn't stand it any longer. I grabbed Lon by the wrist and dragged him out of there. My master let us go. He could have stopped us with a thought, but he didn't. Lon and I ran for a while. I had to get him someplace safe. Something had occurred to me back there. I stopped him at a corner that hid us from security cameras. Then..I broke up with him. I hated doing it. I couldn't even look at him. I hated myself for hurting him. But I knew it was for the better. I understood that Lon and I couldn't continue our relationship the way things were going. I understood what my master meant when he said Lon was in the way. Lon was my light. He was the one truly positive influence in my life, but I had to let go. He was blocking my connection to the dark side. If I was to become a Sith, then I would have to let him go. But just because I broke up with him didn't mean I was ready to fully let go though, but he was gone. Lon was out of my life. I returned to court. I wanted to let my master know that I wasn't going to betray the Empire..and that I was safe. There's something else. Something else I realized. I finally figured out what it was I wanted all my life. I just wanted to be loved..for who I was. I knew that Lon couldn't give that to me. I knew that I loved him, but I will never know if he loved me as well. It doesn't matter know. I'm tired. I'll write more tomorrow. I'm feeling a little better, but the medics insist that I lay low for another week. I want to get back to my training soon, but my master agrees with the medics. So I shall wait.
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